People often debate the fact whether kindness is truly sincere or it is just another form of unfelt flattery. It is debatable that some people use kindness as a way to gain favor and trust. Sometimes we truly want to be nice to someone, but sometimes we just do it to be polite. We live in a society where politeness and civil pleasantries are exchanged often, so some might pass off kindness as something superficial. So what actually motivates people to be nice? There are three factors to kindness, the psychological, moral, and social aspects.
Being kind and triggering people’s good emotions make us feel better. Phenomena such as contagious smiling proves that happy feelings transfer quickly. For example, we may want to laugh just because the person next to us is also laughing. A theory in neuroscience states that “ seeing someone else show an emotion automatically activates the same areas of the brain as if we experienced that emotion for ourselves. This demonstrated how easy it is to transfer emotions to one another and affect your surroundings. Studies also showed that kindness may improve someone’s mood. We, as humans, seem to be happier when sharing our good side with people and showing acts of kindness, whether it is as easy as holding the door or making a large gift. Being nice makes our state of mind better, and we are also able to reflect that emotion to other people.
Morally, being nice makes us feel like we are a better person. Most people feel like being rude or hurtful makes them feel like they are a very poor person with a very bad character. However, when they do something kind, they feel like they are doing good to the world and generally making someone feel happy. It takes a lot of weight off your shoulders when you decide to be nice. For other people, being kind is a core value in their moral code that they could not be seen without. It might have been instilled in them since childhood that being kind was something that was indispensable and that they should be that way at all times. With time, kindness may become something natural towards them and they would randomly do acts of kindness and of helping others without even noticing.
Another key reason for being nice for many people is the social benefits that they receive. As stated in the commonlit article, many people believe that kindness is a “ tool that we cunningly use to become more popular and reap the benefits.”. It is true and can be seen at various times in our lives. For example, we may choose to interact with someone because of their place in the social hierarchy, whether it is at school or at work. Teenagers may like to be “friendly” with the most popular kids just to get a place at the lunch table or receive some benefit. Also, being rude does not get you anywhere in society. People will have a sour impression of the mean person and exclude or shun them from the activities. As humans, we are social creatures and being excluded may feel like our worst nightmare. We all try to be pleasant and relatable because society does not tolerate rude or unpleasant people. No one wants anything to do with someone who is mean to them, and this means that most people have to fake it until they make it when dealing with someone whom they dislike.
In conclusion, being kind can be seen as a psychological, moral, or social phenomenon. People view kindness differently: one as something pure and valuable, and the other as something very materialistic and surface-like. Both thoughts have their own truths, but it is important to know that there is always a middle ground. It would be a very grim world if there wasn’t any actual kindness, so sometimes, it’s better to do something nice once in a while without any plotting, if not we would sink deeper and deeper into the whole of immorality.
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